My last post was fairly emotional as I announced the closing of my store and it was a day filled with tears for me. Since then I have had such an overwhelming show of support from so many people and I am so grateful. But, it also became very clear within days of making my decision that it was the right thing to do. I’m convinced our kids need us as much, if not more, when they enter their teen years. I want to be there to help my son get through school and navigate the waters of transitioning from child to adult. It’s the best gift I can give him!
I’m down to 2 weeks before I close and it all seems very overwhelming. So many little details to tend to that my mind is mush. I admit I am struggling with a severe case of procrastination right now because my “to-do” list is just insane. My store looks so different with many of my displays and fixtures gone. It’s not warm and inviting like it used to be. It’s cluttered and cold feeling (in my opinion) because many of the little touches that I added to make it attractive and special are now gone. It’s like I’m slowly dying every time someone carries away another piece of my store. It’s like a piece of my heart. It’s impossible to convey how much of me went into this boutique. I’m sure that is true of every boutique owner.
I still have moments where I feel like a failure – a failure because I couldn’t keep it open and profitable enough to hire a manager. Maybe I did fail in that way but the beautiful part of failure are the tremendous lessons that I learned so I have to remind myself that it is a stepping stone to what is next. Next time I’ll be better.
I have to admit that I am finding that I am jealous of other boutiques. I miss the regular buying that I did for my store and when I see cute things being posted by other stores it’s hard at times. I really like being in the boutique business. I miss the buying, I miss the hunt for new items, I miss the customers who get so delighted with their new outfits. I don’t miss the taxes, reports, bills, late nights, and sleepless nights, though!
I am looking forward to not being worried about how much my sales are for the day. ?
On the other hand my brain will not let me get away with just being home. I have had dozens of ideas and I’m doing my best to keep myself reigned in so I don’t lose focus of why I chose to close in the first place. I’ll be spending more time on this blog with stories of boutiques and their owners. I just did my first interview and live Periscope broadcast today with a local boutique. (!) Yea, it was so much fun. It was a mess – but it was fun! I am hoping to have that post up within a week. It was definitely out of my comfort zone but am looking forward to seeing where this can go.
The thing about faith is — when God asks you to move forward you can’t unless you first let go of what is in your hands. Then it frees you to grasp what is next and move on. I don’t know what is next for me but I believe that God knows the desires of my heart and also knows best how to fulfill them so I trust that He has already provided the next steps. I wish I had all the answers right now but I don’t. All I know is I am doing what I’m supposed to.
It does help that I’m keeping my website. I have no idea how I’ll grow it but now I will have time to learn how to run an online business. If you haven’t visited my website I’d sure love it if you would and tell your friends about it! (psst…I have FREE SHIPPING!) >>>>
Thanks for your time and see you soon!