Have you ever wanted to connect with someone (or a group of people) you admire and learn from them? They either have the business acumen or spiritually, mentally in a place that you are working towards. However, despite your best efforts, there just doesn’t seem to be a place for you?

It can be frustrating to find people to connect with that give you sense of belonging. Those who are like-minded in their pursuits and values or are further along in their journey where you can benefit from their influence.

We all need to find a table where we can pull up a chair and engage.

Relationships that challenge where we are in life are at these tables. It’s part of growing. If we’re sitting at the same table with the same people talking about the same issues that we were 1 year, 5 years, 10 years ago – we need to get up and move!

God is always moving, always calling us up to a higher level – becoming better in business, relationships, and maturity.

Yet, sometimes we aren’t welcome at certain tables. That doesn’t feel so good.

Finally, someone shared a thought on social media a few months ago that altered my perspective. She said something to the effect, “Stop wasting all your time and energy trying to pull up a chair to a table where you aren’t wanted.”

Wow. That was me!

As I began to think about it, I realized I was getting angry at the people who didn’t want me at their table. But also, why would I want to force myself into the lives of those that didn’t want me? I knew, in that case, I wouldn’t receive the benefits I was looking for.

Instead, I decided to do two things in place of wishing I could be connected and belong to certain groups of people:

  1. Be patient, look, and pray, for the right opportunity to pull my chair up to a table.
  2. Invite others to sit at my table.

Life is about this constant cycle of learning from others ahead of us in life and giving back of ourselves. We can’t be upset with those who refuse to allow us to sit at their table if we are not first keeping a place open at our table for others.

What we’ve learned in life and business isn’t just for us – it’s also our responsibility to pass it on to someone else.

Granted, there are those in life who want to mooch off of as many people as possible and spend their time riding in the wake of those in front. That is probably unavoidable and after some time we may need to excuse certain people from our table.

Let’s guard ourselves from becoming those who misuse the investment of time and resources others offer us. Instead, let’s make sure to responsibly make the most of what people give of themselves for us. This multiplies their efforts as we, in turn, share what we’ve learned with others.

I’m not talking about information or connection shared to the masses. Such as through email or social media.

In this case, I’m talking about the influence and intimacy in each other’s lives that can only come by sitting at a table to dine.

All of us need to find that table where we belong. And we all need to keep a seat open at our table for those seeking the same.

quote over an image of a table with a coffee cup

The day you or I close off our tables to new people, either to those we learn from or invest in is the day we cut off our own future. We’ll become stagnant, ineffective, and stop moving forward.

So if you’ve been trying to get a seat at a table to no avail, perhaps it’s a good sign that it’s a stagnant table – or just not the one where you truly belong. Either way, I discovered that the quickest way to find the best table is to first invest in others. In other words, do to others as you would have them do to you. Think of it as seed. Invite others to YOUR table and then you’ll find an invitation to someone else’s table!


FYI…here’s the best table you can pull your chair up to and…THERE’S ALWAYS ROOM!

Behold, I’m standing at the door, knocking. If your heart is open to hear my voice and you open the door within, I will come in to you and feast with you, and you will feast with me.

Rev. 3:20 TPT